
Since time immemorial humans have forged relationships with the “other”. Whether, it was to marry, to live in groups or to fight against the “enemy”, relationship played a very important role. Thus, the “other” could be the spouse, child, friend, or an outsider.
Accordingly, if it had not been for relationships, human beings would not have multiplied and become fruitful (And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, Gen 1:28, KJV), and we wouldn’t be where we are today.
However, human relationships have also resulted in destruction of individuals, groups and creation. Even the prophet Amos (Thus saith the LORD; For three transgressions of Israel, and for four, I will not turn away the punishment thereof; because they sold the righteous for silver, and the poor for a pair of shoes; That pant after the dust of the earth on the head of the poor, and turn aside the way of the meek: and a man and his father will go in unto the same maid, to profane my holy name: Amos 2:6-7, KJV) had to predict the doom of such relationships which were degrading the human existence of fellow people and driving a wedge in the relationship between Israelites and God.
For this reason, we who live in the 21st century, and who have the benefit of reflecting on the past for a better present, are called upon to strike a balance in our “Relationships”! As God’s children we are burdened to dig deep into our own faith experience and scriptures to find a way out! As Christians, our model for “relationship” has been set forth by God. The “Holy Trinity”, presents a model of dynamic relationship. God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit, is a Godhead of relationship in Unity, yet maintaining their own Identity. In this dynamic relationship we see Creation, Mutual Giving, and Interaction. In God the Father, we have power and strength used to bring things to fullness and life. In God the Son, we see the love of mutual giving through Jesus Christ. In God the Holy Spirit, we see the facilitating of community life in interaction.
Yet this Godhead does not stop at just presenting a model of “relationship” or at limiting its relationship to itself. Rather, we experience the Holy Trinity, proactively seeking us in the hope of breaking into our static life and inspiring us to change our own human relationships and relationship with God. As a result, human relationship finds its direction in the Holy Trinity. Our human relationship has to be based on the great commandment, Mt 22:39 – “You shall love your neighbour as yourself”. This means that we have to approach our “others”, whether outsiders, fellow neighbours, wives, or children, in much the same way as the Holy Trinity seeks us.
Acceptance: Just as God the Father accepts us as we are, we need to accept the “other” for their own uniqueness of creation. Each and every individual has been created in the likeness and image of God (And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: Gen 1:26, KJV) and has his/her own identity which needs to be affirmed and appreciated!
Self-Emptying: Just as God the Son in Jesus Christ was willing to self-empty himself for the sake of the world (For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. John 3:16, KJV), we need to self-empty ourselves when we meet the “other”. Every relationship reaches a comfort level when all parties concerned show a readiness to self-empty themselves of their pride, prejudice and other narrow minded complexes, towards experiencing the beauty of mutual giving. True relationship can only grow when there is a willingness to learn and appreciate the “other”.
Life Together: Just as God the Holy Spirit inspires us to creatively live a witnessing life together (But ye shall receive power, after that the Holy Ghost is come upon you: and ye shall be witnesses unto me both in Jerusalem, and in all Judaea, and in Samaria, and unto the uttermost part of the earth. Acts 1:8, KJV), we need to inspire the “other” in our relationship, to a life of togetherness. This means that we are ready to laugh together, cry together, feel together, be silent together… as the occasion calls us to. This gives rise to the “team factor” which provides space for the individual to grow, and at the same time allows for converging of talent for achieving milestones in life. Thus, our relationship makes us a “team”, where facing good or bad together as a “team” brings the best out of us and helps us realize some of the new dimensions that we and life have to offer each other! We live in a New World Order.
A world where old relationships are broken for new ones, for gain as against personal loss, for personal pleasure as against mutual concern and love. On the contrary, we also see disunited individualism in institutions such as a family where relationships are supposed to bind each other. Nevertheless, Christians who believe in the Triune God, have been called to be different in their life of “relationships”. God in the Holy Trinity has loved us and seeks our participation in our relationship with God and also with “others”. Our God, who calls us to Acceptance, practices Self-Emptying love, and promises Life Together, thereby seeking our response towards “relationship” with “others” – whether it be our wife, children, family, friends or those outside our own little world that we create!
Author: Mr. Joshua Das is a graduate of UTC, Bangalore and heads an NGO ‘Human Development Foundation’ working for the empowerment of gold miner’s family at KGF.